In my more formative years, I owned an iPod. Now, I’m not going to say I used to be an irresponsible electronics owner, but after years of dropping the thing out of my pocket, spilling soda and bong water on it, and tapping the screen incessantly with my (apparently) superhumanly strong fingers, the little trooper decided one day to turn off, and never turn on again. In my agonizing grief, I remembered the all-white glow of the Apple store in the mall not too far from my apartment. After saddling up the courage to venture through the throngs of pre-teens spending other people’s money, I ventured off. The short version of this story is this: my iPod was beyond repair, but I was completely blown away by the immaculate and crisp feel of the Apple store. Brightly lit, high-tech, and everyone was beyond friendly. No really, there’s a reason I’m bringing all of this up. See, The Green Solution’s Grape Street location has been referred to as, “The Apple store of Dispensaries,” and I must say, from product offerings to a highly-sophisticated staff and business model, the similarity between the two is eerily accurate.
As I was exiting I-70, searching for the dispensary, I was convinced my mapping app was telling me a sweet, sweet lie. The location is right off of I-70, true, but it is nestled in the center of a major grocery store’s distribution operation. However, after pushing on and assuring myself that modern technology is not, in fact, out to get me, I found The Green Solution’s Grape Street location. The place sits by itself in front of a large parking lot, which was brightly lit. I knew I was in for a treat when the local hot dog salesman out front waved at me and started singing the dispensary’s praises. If there’s one piece of advice I could give, it would be if the hotdog man likes it, it has to be good. Upon entry, I was asked to show my ID, and was given a slip of paper that gave my name, and indicated that I was, truly, a Colorado resident. I was also asked to sign a waiver, saying that I would not break the law with any of the purchases made at The Green Solution. Fair enough. I was then buzzed through to the product room, which might have also been the original set to Carl Sagan’s “The Cosmos.”
The staff, who were all sharply-dressed and smiling, all greeted me with a wave. Now, I made the mistake of calling the man who was helping me a bud tender. That’s not how things are done at The Green Solution, however. Deliberately, the people helping you out are called “Customer Service Representatives,” just like any other retail business might do. It’s an important distinction to make, only because The Green Solution is about as far as you can get from your average dispensary. So my, erm, Customer Service Representative, or CSR Joseph, shook my hand, and showed me around the brightly lit and electronic tablet-laden store. In short, the place is the definition for a marijuana-themed one-stop-shop.
If you can dream it they will make it, I think. First, I looked at the overwhelming selection of house-made edibles. Now, on the recreational side, you can only buy your edibles in 10mg doses, but at around $2.95 a pop, it wasn’t unheard of to mix and match your way up to any dosage you really want, with the added bonus of being able to try a variety of different flavors. From chocolate mint brownies to peanut butter cups to sour peach rings, The Green Solution makes it and stocks it. Continuing down the line, we arrived at the spot where the concentrates were supposed to be, but the huge display case was mysteriously empty. Joseph informed me that the location was sold fresh out of concentrates (which they also make themselves), but their next shipment was due to arrive any minute. Now, not to generalize, but when someone in the marijuana industry tells you “any minute,” you could be waiting for days. However, as I was standing there, an entire tray of various hash oil concentrates arrived. They were not kidding. And frankly, if concentrates is your thing, go here. First of all, it’s rare to find a place that makes its own concentrates. Secondly, whether you are into shatter, wax, bubble hash, kief, taffy, budder, pie crust, or caviar, they have it.
On top of the concentrate selection, The Green Solution also sells their pre-rolled cannabis. These were impressive, because you could purchase a standard one gram joint, or you could literally supersize with their tulips or the hilariously named “Trifecta” joint, which some might recognize from the stoner flick “The Pineapple Express.” You are also able to buy a pack of five pre-rolled gram joints, if that suits your fancy. At the time, the East Denver location had fourteen strains of flower available for sale, each with its own electronic picture frame, detailing the strain’s breeding history, THC content and tasting notes. While most of the bud available was a hybrid of some kind, there were many strains that clocked in well over 20% THC for smokers who like a more cerebral high.
Finally, The Green Solution also offers a myriad of marijuana-related swag, from backpacks to t-shirts to hemp body washes to flavored bong water to synthetic urine, What!!! Synthetic urine I hear you say and yes that’s right there really is such a thing, click here to Read more about synthetic urine. If you know a friend who also likes to partake in the wonders of all things marijuana, they offer gift cards. They also stock up with an impressive selection of smoking utensils for whatever occasion. Whether you dab, vape, toke, bongrip, whatever, The Green Solution has you covered. Heck, even if you want to start your own happy cannabis garden, they have a clone room with plenty of different strains to choose from.
On my way out of the futuristic store, I had to double-take back at the unassuming building I had just exited from. The hotdog vendor then high-fived me, and asked me what I thought. It’s simple: everyone and everything inside was clean, neat, and responsible. The store has their procedure down to a T. While the location might be out of the way for those unfamiliar with North Denver, The Green Solution’s newest location out on Grape is definitely worth the trip, and is much less scary than preteens buzzing around a food court in a mall.